in my experience, the extent to which a womxn
commits to being the perfect nice girl
at the expense of all her other colors
is the extent to which
she is quietly cruel to herself..
for the human intelligence
to reconcile and integrate the “forbidden”
is to live it
through the inner, intra-personal experience..
true kindness is not niceness.
it is not blunt at one end while it draws blood from the other
kindness knows gentleness and it knows ferocity.
it goes deeper than the surface,
it adapts to meet its context..
you wouldn’t believe the number of years
I whispered to myself-
gentle gentle, soft soft..
in recovery from my own “niceness”
and you may not assume that that kindness
I learned first with myself
taught me gentle ferocity
in protecting and nourishing
what is authentic and deep and true
for every uniquely brilliant human.